Shirley & Marcy

A mother was concerned about her kindergarten son, Timmy, walking to school.

He didn't want his mother to walk with him and she wanted to give him the feeling that he had some independence but know that he was safe.  So she had an idea of how to handle it.  She asked a neighbour if she would please follow him to school in the mornings, staying at a distance, so he probably wouldn't notice her.  

The neighbour said that since she was up early with her toddler anyway, it would be a good way for them to get some exercise as well, so she agreed.  

The next school day, the neighbour and her little girl set out following behind Timmy as he walked to school with another young girl that he knew.

She did this for the whole week. As the two walked and chatted, kicking stones and twigs, Timmy 's little friend noticed the same lady was following them as she seemed to do every day all week.  Finally she said to Timmy,  'Have you noticed that lady following us to school all week? Do you know her?'  

Timmy nonchalantly replied, 'Yeah, I know who she is.'  The little girl said, 'Well, who is she?'  'That's just Shirley Goodnest ,' Timmy replied, 'and her daughter Marcy ...'

'Shirley Goodnest? Who is she and why is she following us?

'Well,' Timmy explained, 'every night my Mum makes me say the 23rd Psalm with my prayers, 'cuz she worries about me so much.  And in the Psalm, it says, 'Shirley Goodnest (surely goodness) and Marcy (mercy) shall follow me all the days of my life', so I guess I'll just have to get used to it!'

 

May Shirley Goodnest and Marcy be with you today and always

 

 

The Kindhearted Scotsman

My wife and I walked past a swanky new restaurant last night.

"Did you smell that food?" she asked. "Incredible!"

Being the considerate person I am, I thought, "What the heck, I'll treat her!"

So we walked past it again.

 

The Meaning of the Bible

A father was approached by his small son who told him proudly, "I know what the Bible means!"  His father smiled and replied, "What do you mean, you 'know' what the Bible means? The son replied, "I do know!"  "Okay," said his father. "What does the Bible mean?" "That's easy, Daddy..." the young  boy replied excitedly," It stands for 'Basic Information Before Leaving Earth.'

 

Breakable Packages

There was a very gracious lady who was mailing an old family Bible  to her brother in another part of the  country. "Is there anything breakable in here?"  asked the postal clerk. "Only the Ten Commandments." answered the  lady.

 

On Waking

"Somebody has said  there are only two kinds of people in the world. There are those who wake up in the morning and say, "Good morning, Lord," and there are those who wake up in the morning and say,  "Good Lord, it’s morning."

 

No Parking

A minister parked his car in a no-parking zone in a large city because he was short of time and couldn't find a space with a meter.  Then he put a note under the windshield wiper that read: "I have circled the block 10 times. If I don't park here, I'll miss my appointment. Forgive us our trespasses." When he returned, he found a ticket from a traffic warden along with this note "I've circled this block for 10 years. If I don't give you a ticket I'll lose my job. Lead us not into temptation

 

Sunday School

A Sunday School  teacher began her lesson with a question, "Boys  and girls, what do we know about God?"   

A hand  shot up in the air. "He is an artist!" said the kindergarten boy.  

"Really? How do you know?"  the teacher asked.  "You know - Our Father, who does art in Heaven...

 

Another Sunday School

Sunday after church, a Mom asked her very young daughter what the lesson was about.  

The daughter answered, "Don't be scared, you'll get your quilt."  

Needless to say, the Mum was perplexed.  Later in the day, the vicar stopped by for tea so Mum asked him what that morning's Sunday school lesson was about.

 He said "Be not  afraid, thy comforter is  coming."

 

General Humour 2

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