1. All members of the congregation planning to dash through the snow in a one horse
open sleigh, going over the fields and laughing all the way are advised that a Risk
Assessment will be required addressing the safety of an open sleigh for members of
the public. This assessment must also consider whether it is appropriate to use only
one horse for such a venture, particularly where there are multiple passengers. Please
note that permission must also be obtained in writing from landowners before their
fields may be entered.
2. To avoid offending those not participating in celebrations, we would request that
laughter is moderate only and not loud enough to be considered a noise nuisance.
3. Benches, stools and orthopaedic chairs are now available for collection by any
shepherds planning or required to watch their flocks at night. While provision has
also been made for remote monitoring of flocks by CCTV cameras from a centrally heated
shepherd observation hut, all users of this facility are reminded that an emergency
response plan must be submitted to account for known risks to the flocks.
4. The angel of the Lord is additionally reminded that, prior to shining his/her
glory all around, s/he must confirm that all shepherds are wearing appropriate Personal
Protective Equipment to account for the harmful effects of UVA, UVB and the overwhelming
effects of Glory.
5. Following last year’s well-publicised case, everyone is advised that Equal Opportunities
legislation prohibits any comment with regard to the redness of any part of Mr R
Reindeer. Further to this, exclusion of Mr R Reindeer from reindeer games will be
considered discriminatory and disciplinary action will be taken against those found
guilty of this offence.
6. While it is acknowledged that gift bearing is a common practice in various parts
of the world, particularly the Orient, everyone is reminded that the bearing of gifts
is subject to Hospitality Guidelines and all gifts must be registered. This applies
regardless of the individual, even royal personages. It is particularly noted that
direct gifts of currency or gold are specifically precluded, while caution is advised
regarding other common gifts such as aromatic resins that may evoke allergic reactions.
7. Finally, in the recent instance of the infant found tucked up in a manger without
any crib for a bed, Social Services have been advised and will be arriving shortly!